Angel's Closet : Being sick

I hate being sick at home. It's the most disabling feeling ever. You don't have the energy or the ability to do the things you are used to and suddenly you feel like a cripple. Unable to do simple things without some assistance.

I am by no means a baby when I am sick neither do I require extra pampering or attention. I usually make sure I go straight to the doctor, get medication then wait. It's the wait while taking medication that kills me. Cause you know you only get better by taking it so it's kind of a process. Sometimes I wish I could just take everything at once and skip the process part. I mean really, do I have to do it a day at a time. Everyone knows I will get better. It's just an illness. And it's not exotic or rare it's as common as flies. It's the flu. Lol it even sounds similar.

The problem with me is that I have long to do lists coupled with calendars and schedules for the day. Which means if I am sick - nothing gets done and no one keeps to the schedule. Not even me. The things I have to do is then pushed to the next day and the next day until I get well enough to be back in the game. I know I sound like a crazy woman right now but it's my calendars and schedules which keeps me focused. Keeps me on my toes and keeps pushing me to be a better version of myself everyday. The most insulting thing someone could ever tell me is that I'm ordinary.

So when I get sick I feel I'm not at my best. I feel inadequate and I feel I am of no good to anyone. I hate that feeling and that's why I hate being sick. But just before I start throwing my own pity party ( and I am good at throwing parties)I start to think of those of who have more than just the common flu. Those Who are diagnosed with Cancer and HIV and all those other dread diseases. I'm sure they all go through the same emotions. They might not have calendars and schedules. They might not be as ambitious as I am. But I'm sure they have families who love them and a life they cherish and have to go through the process of getting better not even knowing if the treatment they are on will work. Unsure if they will even live to see their grandchildren. How terrifying is that ?

So today. I'm going to thank God for my flu. Thank him that all I got is a sore throat and body pains and pray for those who have suffered through worse and those who are still suffering hoping for the best outcome possible....that is not to die.